The Sacredness of Parenthood-Fatherhood

Becoming a parent can be a scary thing, but it can also be one of the most beautiful and joyful journeys that we can experience in life. I understand that becoming a father can be overwhelming. There are many people who have great relationships with their fathers, but there are also people who have no relationship or terrible relationships with their fathers.

My brother-in-law with my nephew and niece.

Fathers play an important part in a child's life. When you grow up without a father, you don't get taught a lot of important things about life. Often times you have more than one male role model, but often get mixed signals of how a man should act. Last semester, I took a survey about families and I asked how people's relationships were with their father. Many of the 155 people who participated said "Good" and "Great", but some people said "Not so great. We fought a lot while I was growing up." Some of the answers that I got that people elaborated on were some of the following: "Strained. We did not really connect."; "He was a good provider and role model. I knew he loved me but he was not overly affectionate."; "Good until he started drinking."; "Our relationship was full of respect, he listened to me and I listened to him... Or took his advice, I wasn't the perfect child... But when it mattered I listened and obeyed. He was the definite enforcer when we needed it."; "He was mostly absent. I could not count on him."
What can we learn from these peoples views on their relationships with their fathers? Not everyone is going to have the exact same type of relationship with their father. My relationship is going to be very different from my best friends relationship with her father, or even my siblings relationship with our father. In doing this survey, I learned a lot and I cried a lot. I'm really grateful for the eye opening results that I was able to get from my friends and my family members. I knew when I opened up the survey that I would be able to get information from people of all faiths and people with different backgrounds from myself.
As a member of the LDS faith, I have been taught that even when you do not have a father in your home, you always have a father of the area you live and you also have our Heavenly Father. A primary song Fathers, holds a very special place in my heart.

1.The father of our home
leads our family
With wisdom's light in all that's right;
My father's good to me.

2. The father of our ward
tends with loving care
Each member's needs with kindly deeds;
Our bishop's always there.

3. And now we'll sing great praise
and reverently recall
The Holy One who gave His Son,
The Father of us all.

Chorus
Fathers are so special
with a very special love.
They watch us and protect us.
They guide us and direct us
Back to our home above.

This song has brought me comfort at some of my darkest hours. Those moments when I was away from my dad, or when I didn't know my bishop very well, I always knew that I had my Father in Heaven right there beside me to guide me back in his love that he has for me. Knowing that no matter where I am headed, I am able to always have at least one father with me at all times, in all things, and in all places.

My dad and I facetiming!!

I want to share some examples of great fathers who have impacted my life so much. The first is my dad, Eugene. My dad is one of the most selfless people that I know. He cares about everyone so much and would do anything for anyone. He is somebody who is willing to do what the Lord needs him to do. He is hard working and provides for his family so that we can all be happy. He sacrifices a lot for the sake of his children and his grandchildren. He makes time for us and works with us with many things, helping us to understand what it is that we are doing. I was extremely blessed to be born into his family and have his as my father.

Two other examples of great fathers are my older brother and my brother-in-law. My older brother has one 9-month-old son. He has sacrificed a great deal and is ready to sacrifice anything to protect his family. He is such a great dad and loves to spend time with his little guy.
My brother-in-law is such a great dad and loves babies. His oldest just turned 3 and he has helped to show him how great it is to be a helper with his younger siblings and to his mom. His little girl is a little over a year old and she is a daddy's girl. She gets so excited when he comes home and she gets to see how a girl or a woman should be treated. His youngest is a week old. He just loves that baby up. He is very well taken care of. Josh has just been a blessing to our family.

My grandpa at Christmas time!

My grandfather, is my last example that I would like to share. My grandfather has been there to support each of us in everything we do. He was so excited when he learned that I would get to try skiing. He has encouraged each of us to do what makes us happy and to have fun with our choices that we are making. He wants us to have fun in life, but to learn to accept everything as a blessing. He has shared his great love of motorcycles and riding with each of us grandkids. He has shown that life can be fun, but that we need to remember who we are while we are living life to the fullest capacity and through our daily trials and hardships.
President Ezra Taft Benson taught that "God established that fathers are to preside in the home. Fathers are to provide love, teach and direct."
It has been suggested that "relationship work involves both the sense of feeling emotionally and physically connected with a son or daughter and the father's efforts to create and maintain healthy bonds between the child, himself, and others in the child's environment."
You never know what is going to happen with life. Life can be cut short and you can lose people. It is hard to lose somebody who you love and care for. It is even harder to lose a parent.